I Want to Find the Love of My Life and Let It Be, Let It Be, Let it Be

I long to be called *bright eyes* again. I long to be loved so truly and graciously as I used to feel at all times as his partner in fun, partner in skiing, partner in exercising, and doing just about anything that brings joy and laughter to the corners of his eyes. I am now searching for that sensual gaze that tells me that he's always there for me and will never leave my side. Yes that person will find me I am certain of this as I hear it so often from others but just not from him, that special person in my life that gratifies me down to my soul.

I want to speak about what things that I long for-to do and to say and to think as I have so much I can bring to this "party" and would happily bring to it now. I love to be loved and gratified both mentally and physically and not as a one way street but as a mutual love or exchange. It being a one way street is not fulfilling, instead it's depleting. When it gets to a point when it's depleting, it's only a matter of time until we're together less and may need to move on.

I want someone who believes in God for all that he is to me. I want someone to love me, I want someone to cherish me, and to think of me first instead of it's all about him. Because it's really all about the both of us. As an uplifting love where neither one of us cancels each other out, instead we uplift each other to find new ground and a greater love than we've ever thought of before. I'd like to find a man who is athletic, intelligent, and caring, who thinks about more than himself. I want a man who is sweet but not too sweet, who is capable of sharing love and being loved for a lifetime. I am a lady who loves to laugh, to sing, to dance, and to be filled with romance, whether it's on the pillowtop or whether it's a twinkling of his eye toward me. These are all the things that I am thinking of this day.

I am Lost in the Mire of the Words That I Seem to Need to Use on a Daily Basis

Filler words-or the overuse of filler words such as "um". Have you ever noticed how the word "um" becomes the principle part of the language most of us tend to speak? "Um" has become a filler word because we don't have in our mind yet what we want to say. So instead, we use some other kind of word to try to express our meaning.

I have started watching my language and realizing that I too am guilty of the same "literary transgression". And so, the word "so" is one of my really bad transgressions. That's probably my favorite transgression and I am presently working like a slave to eradicate it from my dialect. Although I don't think that it's terribly easy to let it go because it seems like it's stuck like glue to my brain, if you will. "Uh", is another one of them. "Uh", is a creepy crawler, like a snake that doesn't want to let go of its prey. What can I say more about "uh", other than it takes so much more to try to get rid of the word "uh" than it does to say it. "So" what I want to do is get rid of it. How do we get rid of it?

How does one let those "literary transgressions-lt's" go. I don't have an answer at this point. I am afraid of using those words over and over again. Not that I want to, just that they are uninvited. And I am still going in circles. No matter how much I try not to, I am still speaking in circles. Know what I mean? Know what I mean Jean? There are funny little rhymes that we tend to make as maybe a faux pas. "Know what I mean" is another cute little filler. "You know" is "so" badly overused. And because they are "so" overused, it is hard not to say them all the time. Let's try to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps. Now is that a colloquialism or a euphemism? A euphemism is something that you're saying that is nicer than what you could have said. Let's pull ourselves up instead of falling flat on our okole. I am lost in the mire of these words.

Let Me Tell You How Agreeable I Can Be...

There are different kinds of agreeable, don't you think? I have been in several relationships where I find that agreeability doesn't always come so easy. I wish that it did, because that would make my life SO much easier. Of course, that would indicate that everybody would agree with me, and funnily enough, that certainly is not the case. In my estimation, most people find me to be rather agreeable although I should highlight the rather because it's only my opinion. After all, I think that I am extremely agreeable, just ask me, because I'll tell you all about how lovely I can be.

Whatever is righteous, humble, honest, lovely, honorable, think on these things and make them yours.

I feel the necessity to express my personal need for calmness around me, in my hands, in my heart, and essentially throughout my body. I'm imagining that some of you among my readers may feel the need for serenity as much as I do. So why do I seek the calmness. I seek it because I haven't found it to be mine at this point in time. I love to laugh, I love to bring joy, I love to bring funny thoughts that help to locate people's funny bones. That might be why I am choosing to write this blog in this way today. Calmness to me is being with the people that I love. I want to be around people that I love, honor and cherish, as well as so many other appealing and attractive mannerisms. So I am posing this question to you, what does it take for you to feel calm and joyous? Do they even come in the same "box" together? I want it to because I seek it now.

I express my calmness to you now by way of giving you some quotes from some of my favorite scriptures from the Bible as they have helped me on so many occasions. I am in hopes that you will find peace and joy through these lovely thoughts and phrases. Think on these things: whatever is good, whatever is lovely, whatever brings joy, remember to think on these things. Whatever brings happiness to anyone around you, always think on these things. Whatever is holy or righteous, think on these things. Whatever is kind, always think on these things. From Philippians 3:4, "Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things."

I want wisdom and humility-these are the things that I honor so much in this life. I don't find that there are many people who really understand what it is to have honor and to really live a life filled with honorable thinking at all times and who choose to walk this path. What honor means to me is hard to describe but yet so incredibly important to do. I believe that honor is what I want to show in myself at most any time if not all the time because it really is the principle ingredient of what God gave to all of us-honesty and righteousness. Bringing myself back to the thought of attaining calmness, I find that wisdom, humility, honesty, and righteousness help me along the way. People constantly tell me about how they are so stressed out and I believe that the stress we're all talking about needs to be let go of and the calmness needs to be let in.

Within nature is a lovely way to help find calmness. What within nature helps me to feel such calmness? Is it the water dropping? Remember a few blogs ago I wrote about the negative ion charges you get when you inhabit water for a time. Especially crashing waterfalls, the ocean scent at sunrise or sunset, and the beach. I am in hopes that more resonating calmness can be yours with just the simple action of walking into a tropical rainforest in Hana or sitting by a beautiful lake.

My Angel Garden of Love & Joy

I'm sure we all have "mother stories", and I am certainly holding on to my own "mother story". My mother has a very funny sense of humor, at times, and one time I wanted to mention to you my reader, that I had a lovely bottle of wine and shared it with my mother. The funny thing about that story is that my mother can't really handle liquor very well, in fact she can't handle much liquor at all, and she continued to get wasted on this particular bottle. My mother, while she is not normally very funny at all, she really found her funny bone and she was absolutely hysterical. We laughed so hard about whether one could be rock solid and spontaneous simultaneously. And I laughed so hard that I cried. Do you think you can be rock solid and spontaneous at the same time? This is a question I'm posing to you my readers as well. So, if you have a wicked sense of humor, I pose this to you to see if you find this ridiculous or somewhat comical.

The thing is about my mother is that I really love, honor, and respect her. For all the lovely things that she has done for me, although it is very hard to remember them most times, but I really want to say that I am lucky to even have a mother who is alive and I do love her very much. But getting back to the point of realizing that my mother has given me a lovely idea of starting a garden. I want to have a whole potpourri of garden flowers such as pansies, petunias, and plumeria. All these flowers bring so much joy to me because they are alive, growing, and luscious. Flowers make me feel like I am mid-tropics which is ideal for me considering that I am, of course, a Maui girl and there's no way that anyone can take that identity away from me. When I see flowers it reminds me of my mother and my deep love for her so my garden will be a tribute to her.

Aloha.... I'm back!!!

Hello my friends....I'm BAACK!

I'm sorry for the long break I've needed to take. Although it has been an unecessary time as my mother has been ill, I'm back now and intend to be writing to you, my wonderful and beloved listeners.

Fear not, I'll be writing to you for a very long time to come. So for now I'm sending you a bouquet of flowers with much ALOHA.

Tara